Day 162: 2/20/12 - "Why Can't I"

"Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you"

-"Why Can't I?" by Liz Phair

Missed Moments: You know how you watch tv sometimes and you see a commercial or a movie or tv show where two people meet by accident and it just seems like the moment is right and they connect?  Well I feel as if I almost had that moment today and for some reason it just didn't happen.  I hate thinking back on things and trying to figure out what I did wrong.  Did I do something wrong?  Did I miss out on something really important?  A part of me knows that everything was all in my head - that there never was a "moment" and that my overactive imagination was being...overactive.  But another part of me can't help but wonder if I could have said something to cause a different outcome.  I'll never know and it's not important anyway...just another missed moment.

Early Morning Presentation: Tomorrow my co-presenter and I are holding our roundtable at the FYE conference.  On one level I'm a little nervous as I always am when I have to present in front of people, but on the other hand I'm just dreading having to get up so early to give a presentation.  I'm hoping it goes well since my plans to bake muffins have already gone awry.  I didn't exactly "burn" them but they came out a little more brown than I intended.  Now I have to take them to work and hope my colleagues there will eat them and enjoy them.

Day 132: 1/21/12 - "You Are Not Alone"

"That you are not alone, for I am here with you
Though you're far away, I am here to stay
But you are not alone, for I am here with you
Though we're far apart, you're always in my heart
But you are not alone"

-"You Are Not Alone" by Michael Jackson

5 Miles Down: I actually got up at 5:30 am this morning just to run and stay on target for keeping my weight off?  Why?  Because at conference I tend to overeat or just eat unhealthy items.  Running in the morning helps me to at least combat this partially and hopefully keeps me on task for future weight loss.  I'll take tomorrow off since it is Sunday and since I am tired, but I will get right back to it on Monday.

Presentation Tomorrow: I have a presentation tomorrow as part of a panel session and though I feel a little unprepared, I'm not nervous at all.  I guess it is because I know the material so well and I've worked hard to actually act on the items I talk about.  It could also be because being nervous only makes things worse, so I'm not allowing myself to think about it too much.  We'll see if this holds up for the actual time of the panel session. It's easy to talk a big game but you gotta bring it as well.

Day 61: 11/11/11 - "Home"

"Maybe surrounded by

A million people I

Still feel all alone

I just wanna go home"

-"Home" by Blake Shelton

Presentation: I did a presentation today on the "The Customization of Services for Millennium Generation Students" with my colleague at the Access Services Conference in Georgia.  I felt the presentation went well, though it was not my best.  I had trouble getting into it, though I got compliments from people on how well it went and my poise.  Though I did feel like a fish out of water at this conference, since it is not my area of expertise, I do feel that I learned a lot and that the conference itself was well done.  They even fed us lunch at the end before we headed out.  I went ahead and went to the airport early with my colleague and wound up being there for nearly 6 hours.  At least I got a lot of knitting done...

Plane Conversations: I was reminded today of how nice it is to find someone you can just easily speak with and that you have some things in common with.  Too bad he was also happily married with children (story of my life).  You figure out pretty quickly, like I did, not to even expect to find anything else out there - it doesn't exist for some of us.  What did we talk about it?  Strangely enough, everything from flossing and the importance of taking care of your teeth, to dressing and cranberry sauce (jellied!) during Thanksgiving.  As I said, good conversations.

Ignoring Somethings Can be Detrimental to Your Health: But I'm ignoring my e-mail right now.  I don't want to answer it - I won't answer it - and I won't feel guilty about it.  I might feel differently tomorrow, but today, I'm tired and I'm going to bed.  And those who thought it was okay to send out e-mails on my behalf without checking with me first or even cc'ing me, will have me to deal with at the beginning of next week.  Beware, the *itch is back in town.