Day 17: 9/28/11 - "Who Knew"

"When someone said count your blessings now,
'Fore there long gone.
I guess I just didn't know how
I was all wrong..."

- "Who Knew" by Pink

Unhappy Camper: That was me today - nothing made me happy and everything bothered me for one reason or another. Some things I think I was right to be bothered by. Other things I think I just let get to me (or maybe they just felt bigger than they were because of all of the other things). My list:

• Woke up with a headache and still shaky (like most mornings).
• Watch battery stopped working so I wound up being late for two appointments.
• Complaints from students related to other students eating/drinking in the library (and subsequently a near argument with someone else about it as I tried to explain what the problem was).
• Left ankle swollen after only half the day (Really? I didn't even do anything to it today!)
• Forget to plug in my phone and it dies and then it won't charge properly.
• Ran out of baking cups and butter so had to hit the store on the way home during the height of traffic and heat.
• Father called to let me know that the car dealership where I got his car again reneged on their deal of free oil changes. Now I'll have to call them tomorrow to complain and let them know that they've lost our business (like they'll care!).
• 2 new major things added to my "to do" list for work, when I'm already seriously behind.
  

I think that's enough. If I add all of the recurring things, I might as well call it the "Bitching Blog."

My Failure as a Teacher: I'm starting to feel like I'm not being a very good (effective) teacher for my students this year. My group is so homogenous and I'm used to having some more distinctive personalities. I can't decide if I'm being handcuffed by the syllabus and topics that I did not choose (I just teach them), or if I'm just not a very good teacher for this particular group of students. How do I keep them from failing and also not fail them at the same time? Conundrum.

Money Flies: I know they say that time flies, but lately I would say that money flies...as in out of my wallet and away from me. It's funny how these things all seem to happen at the same time. Large medical bills come in at the same times as my professional organization membership renewal, and my need to make my travel arrangements for conferences. have over $2,000 go out of your pocket at one time really hurts, even when some of it will come back eventually. I wonder what it's like for those who don't have money worries. Reminds me of a line from one of my favorite songs, "I Am" by Train:

"I never had a day when money didn't get in my way."

Apropos I think.

Book Ideas: I know, if I can't finish the books I'm working on already, why in the world would I want to start thinking about another book idea? But this one is different - it's not fiction, it's real life. And it's a perspective I don't think others would think of. I won't pitch it fully here (don't want someone else to try to take it away from me), but I will say that it could be a great documentary as well!

Home made Buttercream: I know I've said this before, but I need to say it again...I will never buy canned frosting again! I've made buttercream so many times now that it seems like second nature. And the quantity you get and the quality as well are so much better than the pre-made stuff. I don't know if others agree, but I know I'll always splurge on the butter and powdered sugar and make my own! Check out my Day 2 for the actual recipe.