Day 261: 5/29/12 - "C'est La Vie"

"Got a job

That's okay

But they've got me workin' night and day.

Punchin' in

Punchin' out

Is this really what life's all about?

What you gonna do?

What you gonna feel?

I don't know.

What you gonna feel?

What you gonna do?

Won't someone tell me?

What you wanna say

What you wanna do?

There's only one thing left to say

C'est la vie..."

-"C'est La Vie" by Robbie Nevil

Foreboding: I have this very bad feeling that something is wrong.  I can't quite tell if the something is wrong with me physically, mentally, socially, etc.  I just don't know what it is and I can't put my finger on what is causing this sensation, but I know something is wrong.  I'll try to sleep tonight and hope I feel better tomorrow - but whatever this is, is leaving a hollow feeling in my chest, my throat is tight, and I feel as if I'm going to have a panic attack.  Haven't had one of those in a long time...don't want them to start up again.

Granola: I seem to be on this mission to stop buying processed foods.  Even though some of my concoctions aren't necessarily "healthy," I still feel better about eating them because at least they are made from scratch and I know what goes into them.  It's why I keep trying to find recipes that don't require dyes to create their colors, or fake flavoring to create their taste. My new kick has been making my own granola bars.  I usually try to fix them so that I get a nice bar that travels well, but I altered my recipe slightly and wound up with a less connected mixture.  It crumbled so nicely that I decided to just carry it like crunchy granola for my yogurt.  Here is what I use in my granola:

2 cups rolled oats
1/2 cup sunflower seed kernels (unsalted)
1 cup almonds (I use whole, but you could use slivered, or chopped)
1/2 cup wheat germ
1/2 cup honey (I substitute regular sugar or splenda when I'm out of honey - makes for crumbly granola)
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 oz unsalted butter
2 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp kosher salt
6.5 oz dried fruit (I like cranberries, or raisins)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.  Combine the oats, sunflower seed kernels, almonds, and wheat germ, spread in a half sheet pan, and place in  the oven to toast for about 15 minutes.  Make sure to check on the mixture and stir around so that it won't burn.  Combine the honey (or granulated sugar), brown sugar, butter, vanilla, and salt in a medium sauce pan over medium heat.  Cook until the sugar dissolves.  Remove the oat mixture from the oven and reduce the oven temp to 300 degrees.  Add the oats mixture to the melted sugar mixture, and then add the fruit.  Stir to combine.  Spread back into the half sheet pan and flatten to the edges.  Place back into the oven and bake for about 15 minutes.  Check at this point to make sure you don't burn the granola.  Remove from oven and allow to cool.  If you used the honey, you likely will be able to cut the baked sheet into bars (though some will likely still bake).  If you used sugar (or left out some of the sugar), you'll likely have something that will crumble easily.  Break this up and place into bowls.  You can eat it just like it is, use it with yogurt or on anything else that works with a topping, or serve with milk.  Pretty tasty!  I've also added chocolate chips - They don't look pretty but they taste pretty good!