"I know there's pain
Why do you lock yourself up in these chains?
No one can change your life except for you
Don't ever let anyone step all over you."
-"Hold On" by Wilson Phillips
Letting Go: Have you ever had a moment when you realized that something you had always dreamed of having was never going to happen to or for you? I've had this happen off and on over the years and always I've just rearranged by dreams so that I was still able to cling to at least part of a dream. But today I had one of those "never gonna happen" epiphanies and I can honestly say that this one broke my heart. Today I realized I would never own my own home. Now, I know what most of you are thinking - isn't it a little too early for me to make this declaration? But the truth is, I've felt this way for some time. And there is more to this than just money. Getting enough money to make a down payment on a house is going to be a daunting task. Getting a bank to give me a loan would be difficult. Being able to afford the monthly payments, along with the taxes, insurance, and general house maintenance that will be needed - completely out of my reach. Finding a city I want to live in long enough to actually buy a house? That might be even more difficult than the money aspects. Maybe in some ways this will be a good thing. I won't have anyone to leave a house to anyway, and why would I want to live alone in a house? The next thing you know I'll go out and start adopting stray animals and become that scary lady down the street that all of the kids are afraid of. No thank you - I'll stick to apartment living until its time to put me in a nursing home.
No Water: Tomorrow they plan to shut off the water in the complex for most of the day if not longer. They found a broken water line in the complex and apparently have to turn off all of the water to fix it. Of course they can't guarantee that they'll even get it fixed by 5. They would manage to pick a day when everyone will be home due to a holiday. What are we supposed to do with no water for a day? The toilets won't even flush without water! This could get very ugly my friends. They've told us to fill up our tubs for any water we may need but that won't help me in the kitchen (no way I'm cleaning or cooking with bath tub water!). I'm off to figure out if I have any containers in the kitchen that will hold some water for me. *sigh*
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